32 locked and loaded…

Maktub.. It is written and so it shall be. 

I was going to go to sleep, but I’m feeling a bit despondent.  It’s my 32nd birthday tomorrow. I have to be up early, pack up my life and go to work, then after that, catch a flight and a train home.  

Home… To Johannesburg.  That’s a thought.  Quite a pleasant one… I smile.  Deep in my heart, this is what I desire.  And for this reason, I am happy to be going home.  On my 32nd birthday. My life is goin to be there.. For a while at least. 

I think of all the possibilities, a life unexplored… And smile again… I am smiling.. Because somebody out there hears me…and has prepared me for this. For the longest time I’ve feared Jhb.. Not for the place I guess… But who I would become there.  Fear no more, dear soul, you had to be here to get here.  It’s like a slow roast, boiling at first, simmering, burning off the fat… I have felt the fire, my skin almost peeling at the heat….  But then I get removed from the pot, into a pan… And into the oven….  It’s dark and hot but I’m used to the heat… No one can boil me twice. 

The heat is different though… Tempered, and I brown beautifully… This has been 29,30 and 31…and as I glaze… I am again removed and am now resting.  Lol the foodie in me just had to…  

So 32, I’m ready.  There is no calendar going forward, no ticking time bomb, you see I got proverbial at 31. I go into you quietly, pensively…  

Epilogue to 32… 

Dear Galaletsang, 

Well done. You survived, hell you made it to me. I am so proud of you.  You’ve taken such risks to reach this space. So many challenges,so many victories. You are one courageous woman, I can tell you that… The deep end doesn’t scare you.. It’s the shallow water with the sharp rocks you’ve learnt navigate. 

 I think you’ve done all you can for the 31 you lived.  You’ve done your best.. At other times your worst but guess what, I’m the only one who was watching. 

I wish you tenacity going forward, passion beyond pain, wealth in abundance, friendship, love and a GLA (had to put it out there).. I love you more than anything and don’t ever forget that. Go out there, and be the dopest associate, mom, daughter,  sister, wife (yeah I said it) friend and human being you can possibly be. And write that book.  It’s clear that you can.  Again.. I love you. 

Happy birthday dearest. 

Love, your 31 year old 

Gala 

And so it shall be.